Yesterday a friend came over and said I heard you help women, their family and friends when someone has had a miscarriage.  Can you help me?  My sister-in-law had a miscarriage and none of us know what to do, how can we help?

I told her I was very sorry.  I asked how was everyone doing.  Seems her sister-in-law didn’t want to talk much about her miscarriage.  My friend clearly wanted to, so we did.  I shared with her that the best thing to do is to acknowledge her sister-in-laws loss, then take the cue as a next step from her.  If she doesn’t want to talk about it, think you have to respect her wishes (see our 7 tips on how to help).

Then she asked if I would share my story… and I did.  And it hit me  — Jan 15th had passed…  without incident…  how could that be?  I usually dread the day.  Think about it for many days in advance.  This year, for the first time in 7 years, I didn’t.  I didn’t stress myself out.  I didn’t blame myself.  I did ask why.  I didn’t …  I didn’t… I didn’t…  and then I realized, I didn’t feel guilty.  And it was ok.  While I will always miss my child, for the first time in a long time I feel like I am healing.  I am finding peace.  It feels good…

I hope you find the same!

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